I refuse to deal with customers like this

1PM And You're Getting Warmer...Warmer...No, Colder...Colder...Warmer...

Customer: Umm... Excuse me, do you have that book?
Bookstore employee: Do you know the title?
Customer: No.
Bookstore employee: Do you know the author?
Customer: Uh... No, but they wrote that other book.
Bookstore employee: Do you know where the other book is in the shop?
Customer, brightly: Yeah! It's over there somewhere! (points behind himself to the entire shop)

Darwin
Australia

via Overheard in the Office, Sep 15, 2009