AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Stuff is complicated, confusing....and messed up... Yet that's the way its SUPPOSED to be. If everything were just easy to figure out, understand and reach then the world would be a pretty boring place wouldn't it??? AAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just want to scream and rip out my stupid and foolish heart... It keeps trying to screw me over and it's all I can do to ignore it.... Why should I have to ignore it??? Why can't it just behave for once???????? Someone shoot me, if you please...maybe just once in the big toe, that might do it. But is it really my heart or is it my mind, or soul?? Is the heart not just a vessel that keeps blood flowing throughout the body? Well whatever the case, whatever is forcing me to feel, I want it to be damned. To stop betraying me. I don't want to feel. At least not that feeling. Love. Love is a son of hctib. But then, what would a world be like without love? A bunch of me's walking around? Ahh it makes me miserable because there's nothing I can do. Stupid emotions are betraying me. Why these hsi-elohssa emotions bring me to this one person I don't even understand. The question I continue to ask myself is why him...what reason, but does love need reason??? I've never seen one example anywhere, where love has reason, even in the best match, they were just matched, no explanations...sometimes there were good reasons as to why they love that person but thats decision love, and is that true? Aah loves a hateful bitch... I don't want to feel this emotion right now, with this person. It's making me hurt.....because nothing will come of it. My idiotic stupid asshole-ish foolish heart.